"Wedding Daze", the 2006 movie staring Jason Biggs and Isla Fisher, was one of the worst movies I have ever seen. It did, however, bring up some interesting thoughts. All in all, it wasn't a total waste of my time, but this certainly wasn't the type of movie that suits my taste anymore.
Anderson, played by Jason Biggs, proposes to his girlfriend. Before she can even give an answer, she keels over and dies. Anderson finds no joy in life anymore and falls apart. After a year of unhappiness, Anderson is out to lunch with a friend. The friend convinces Anderson that he needs to try again to find love.
Anderson tries to prove to his friend that he will never find love again by asking the waitress, played by Isla Fisher, if she will marry him. To his surprise, Katie says yes. The remainder of the movie is a comedic look at how the couple move in together, have their first argument, and eventually get married.
The premise of the film seems interesting and enjoyable. It could have been a terrific hour and a half. Unfortunately, the movie was filled with disgusting jokes, words that didn't need to be used, and events that seemed so far off the chart I didn't quite understand how they fit in. I would give this movie two out of five stars.
What this show did have to offer, though, was an interesting perspective. I began to think; Whatwould it be like to marry someone you had just met? Does marriage actually have a better chance of making it if we spend months or years getting to know someone? Can we have a better chance if we learn to love the person within the marriage?
In 2004, Daniel and I separated for a short time. During the time we lived away from each other I had a lot of time to think. What I came up with was this: We all have issues and problems. By leaving my husband and eventually moving on with another man, I would be trading one set of problems for another. Sure, life would be fresh and new for a period of time, but in the end real life would prove that no relationship is ever perfect.
Watching "Wedding Daze" I was thinking that this couple might actually have a better than "normal" chance of succeeding. If they took life and marriage seriously, they would learn who they are as a couple while learning about each other. The give and take of a standard marriage would be balanced with the freshness of getting to know each other. I really think they might stand a chance.
Through the last 10+ years of marriage, I have come to realize that love and marriage are really a choice. When people say marriage is something couples have to work at, that is not an exaggeration. For a truly satisfying relationship, each partner needs to do a part. I don't believe that the responsibilities need to be split 50%/ 50%. Some days it may even be that one partner has 100% of the responsibility. In the end, it will all work out as long as honest communication is occurring.
In the end, I believe that Anderson and Katie, if they were real people, could have a good shot at marriage. If they are each willing to grow with the other and to bend when needed, they can get through anything. I wish more couples would be willing to understand that marriage isn't all about the feeling of being in love. It's about being each other's friend in the most basic sense of the word. Being there for each other for whatever is needed, in the good times and the bad.